It is Getting Harder and Harder to Pretend I am Not Grown Up

My 26 year old brother is getting married. This is a kid who less than a year ago gleefully told me about running a motorcycle into a tent housing people whose early bedtime did not live up to his partying standards. This boy used to engage me in “reasons to get married” conversations which resulted in lists like:

1. Well, what if you really needed nice silverware? Like what if you had a job where you had to host lots of dinner parties?
2. Ok, let’s say you’re super religious and very eager to have some sex?
3. Perhaps you have crappy friends who won’t show up to a party without pretense?

Last Thursday when Kurt told me about the engagement I was on my way home from wine club where I had luckily partaken in just enough of the devil’s juice to keep my head from exploding (Rose wine, haven’t you heard? The devil is going subtle these days). In true low key baby brother fashion (tendency to crash motorcycles into tents aside) he just slipped this nugget into our boring conversation about each other’s weekend plans, “So you should look for a plane ticket so you can be home on April 19^th.” Which allowed me to ask “why?” and buy a moment to catch my breath and resist blurting out “OH MY GOD ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED?!?! ARE YOU EVEN OLD ENOUGH? IS THIS LEGAL????”

I’ve managed to chill out over the weekend and I think I might be able to get through to April without having a break down about being old and single. Congratulation Kurt, I know you never read my blog but if you did you would be super happy that I did not use this opportunity to tell embarrassing stories about your childhood. I’m saving those for my drunken toast.